First off, all of this is based off of my personal experiences and I am not a doctor, non do I personally hold any current medical credentials and none of this should be considered as medical advice and one should consult a doctor in regards to the medical phenomenon talked about here if they are experiencing them but with that being said, for frankly legal liability reasons, I’ve personally have spent the last several years on a personal journey of discovery of sorts coming up with frankly a pretty large body of advanced theoretical work and I have personally been attempting to figure out a way to get that large body of theoretical work out to the world but to date no one appears to really be interested.

In that the journal that I submitted to wasn’t interested, medical news site that I submitted to wasn’t interested, many literary agents that I personally contacted weren’t interested to date, the one publisher that got back to me wasn’t interested, and my doctors seeming weren’t interested/my medical provider wasn’t interested either and frankly I think that it is potentially because they are actually truly terrified of what all of the stuff that I came up with may actually potentially mean in the grand scheme of things. Meaning that modern medicine may have been totally wrong this whole time on some frankly really big medical issues to potentially the massive detriment of their patients on a potentially unfathomable scale in modern time but I personally like the notion that we as human beings fight the truly scary things with the best understanding and knowledge that we can muster in the grand scheme of things.

So, I am trying again and I am personally writing a blog post to attempt to make the loose core medical Hypotheses I came up with that started me on my personally journey public and possibly a ridiculous amount more if people are actually interested and just maybe that notion will lead to some more interest and so on and so forth. With that being said, I currently looking for a ghost writer, a literary agent and publisher if anyone is interested.

So, lets start off with what actually happened to me personally. Back in the summer of 2016 I was personally working as a scuba diving instructor in the Florida Keys and I suddenly got progressively really sick from a mental health perspective. My personal mental health got progressively worse and worse over a few months period of time seemingly out of nowhere. I personally discovered at the end of that summer when totally taking apart my personal scuba gear that there was a very thin layer of seemingly very toxic mold on the interior of my primary scuba diving regulator that I had personally been exposed to over the last few months and I had seemingly been severely poisoned with a seemingly complex mycotoxin.

This poisoning did not show up on any standard blood tests and my organs were functions fine. So, my personal doctor simply just did not care in the slightest and simply refused to look into the matter any further and it just didn’t seemingly matter whatsoever what my personally symptoms were, he was right and I was wrong because he was a doctor. His professional opinion was that mold can’t hurt you like that and frankly that truly arrogant notion was ultimately very wrong as I would come to personally realize over time.

My personal mental health continued to collapse over the coming years and not surprisingly one can’t really successfully advocate for themselves whatsoever when their personal mental health is currently in total shambles and their personal doctors and healthcare provider just don’t seem to care in the slightest as long as their personal immediate liability is currently covered in the eyes of the law from their personal perspective. So, in 2018 I personally realized/came to the understanding that I wasn’t getting any better at all. So, I personally decided to take things into my own hands and started extensively searching the online world in regards to all of the currently known theoretical experimental research into severe depression, suicidality and mutilation impulse and personally started experimenting on myself with over-the-counter supplements.

I personally adopted the total mentality that if it shouldn’t have the ability to potentially kill me according to the currently known research and it might help, I was willing to give it a try and see what happens and it frankly took a ridiculous amount of trial and error and several years but I was personally able to put all of that negative mental health phenomenon that I was experiencing into total long term remission for me personally and I am interested in/willing to share those notions with others but I personally need a ghost writer, a literary agent and publisher since I currently have roughly 1200 pages of “raw theories” from the last few years and I am personally could use some help going through them all.

Now, with all of that being said, I would like to share the rough two core mental health theories/hypothesis that originally led to my personal journey of discovery and just maybe people will be interested beyond their own personal fear. With that being said, these two theories are just the base core rough medical theories that I came up with during the course of my personal journey of discovery and are frankly laughably little when compared to the other stuff that I came up with throughout my personal course.

I originally ultimately came to the conclusion that actually started me off on my personal journey of discovery that the “toxin” that I had personally been exposed to in the summer of 2016 was extremely likely a class of natural mutagenic mycotoxin and thus was extremely likely actually leading to my personal perpetual suicidality at the time. In that I personally came to the original ultimate conclusion that suicidality extremely likely isn’t what modern medicine actually thinks it is and potentially in reality it is extremely likely that suicidality actually originally neurologically evolved for human beings as an extremely advanced survival protocol for our species to potentially defend our bodies/brains against potential complex toxic exposure via attempting to encourage any given individual to potentially manually dissipate that potential complex toxin via potentially via self-engaged bloodletting via the potential slitting of one’s wrists, which is frankly a pretty creepy notion. Meaning that basically suicidality in humans may be the equivalent to projectile vomiting for the blood for our species and that potential simply notion is in essence where my personal journey really started off. Now, there’s a ridiculous amount more too from my ultimate personal understanding than this potential notion but this short short version just to attempt to get things started.

So, let’s move on to my personal mutilation impulse/self-harm understanding, after a time and personally experimenting for a while I personally figured out how to eventually put my long-term personal suicidality into total remission. But I had personally developed a mutilation impulse over time, so I started doing research into mutilation impulse and after a while I personally ultimately came to the ultimate conclusion that the “toxin” that I had personally originally gotten exposed to in 2016 had literally extremely likely depleted so much sulfur out of my body via my body attempting to metabolize that “toxin” out of my body that that notion may have extremely likely literally depleted the sulfur containing lining within my personal blood vessels systemically over time and thus my blood vessels extremely likely couldn’t relax the way that my brain wanted them to relax anymore and the seemingly innate human neuroevolutionary defense mechanism for this potential notion was extremely likely what was actually causing my personal mutilation impulse at the time.

Meaning that basically, there is frankly a very high probability mutilation impulse/self-harm in humans at its core is extremely likely one of the potential manifestations of a severe form of advanced sulfur deficiency in humans. During that course of this part of my personal journey, I personally noticed that my personal mutilation impulse at the time appeared to tied directly to my current diastolic blood pressure levels in that whenever my current diastolic blood pressure level spiked for whatever reason my personal mutilation impulse would temporarily get a lot worse. So, I personally concluded that it is extremely likely that mutilation impulse/self-harm has a high diastolic blood pressure level trigger during a current severe sulfur deficiency for any given individual. This potential notion seemingly lines up biologically very well in that when any given individual engages in self-harm this notion by default forces an endorphin response in the human brain and thus lowers current diastolic blood pressure levels by default thus seemingly putting that mutilation impulse/self-harm increase back into temporary remission.

So, then I came to my ultimate conclusion/understanding as to what Impulse/self-harm actually potentially extremely likely actually is in humans. In that basically mutilation impulse/self-harm in humans is seemingly the result of an advanced biological/neurological defense mechanism in order to defend the bodies blood vessels from a potentially fatal vascular rupture due to severe long term sulfur deficiency, once again a very creepy notion. Thus, mutilation impulse in humans during a current high diastolic blood pressure spike encourages or forces in the most extreme circumstances individuals to literally potentially cut themselves to potentially relieve current high blood diastolic pressure off of their circulatory system as long as that severe sulfur deficiency remains for that individual.

I personally would have liked to think that modern medicine would have been interested in these notions but there was no interest seemingly as long as their personal liability was seemingly currently covered. I think that we as a culture can do better and frankly, we need to do better. With that being said, for anyone who is interested in hearing me out I have a lot more that I am personally willing to talk about including my personal successful treatment patterns for suicidality, mutilation impulse, anxiety, depression and frankly much much more in the grand scheme of things to honestly an unfathomable level. If you as the reader managed to read this far, I thank you for reading and just maybe this can be the start of something potentially interesting in the grand scheme of things.